Journey back about 50 years. There was a time when cellular phones didn’t exist, very few households actually had a television, and society was nowhere near the idea of nanotechnology. Return to the present day where laptop computers are everywhere, vaccinations for numerous illnesses are taken regularly, and people appear to talk to themselves through Bluetooth headsets. Look at all the technological advances we have acquired in less than half a century! As we continue to push forward in additions to machines and inventions, people stopped to ponder the consequences. Both positive and negative results are shown through science fiction. The Science Fiction, Sci-Fi, genre is wholly based on plausible outcomes of new science issues and events. Excellent science fiction allows the viewer’s mind to wander beyond solid facts of our present knowledge because it displays the positive, or negative, consequences that may result from an event or situation.
The biggest part of a Science Fiction would be the scientific breakthroughs. Without the ‘science’, Science Fiction would simply be a boring form of just ‘fiction’. The Sci-Fi genre introduces people to the most recent science breakthroughs, in our present time period, or even things that don’t yet exist. The idea needs to be recent enough to still capture people’s attention, yet general enough to leave a wide range of possibilities to expand on. In the 1966 to 1969 series of Star Trek (Director: Gene Roddenberry) audiences were captivated by the range of new gadgets. For these people, seeing Captain Kirk flip his small, portable communicator to talk to Sulu, or Spock beaming down to the planet from the spaceship, was mind blowing. Scenes that showed of these types of devices stretched the imagination of some- to wonder what if the world actually had these things like it.
In any good Science Fiction story there is an interesting and exciting storyline. Storylines show off a stable setting, meaning that the facts of the story are constant throughout. Also, the conflict is clear, and the overall story ends in a satisfying place for the viewers. In Wall-E (2008, Director: Andrew Stanton), the setting of Earth begins as a desolate place- seemingly unable to sustain life. Meanwhile the humans are living on a spaceship. In the first scene where these humans are shown, the audience can infer that humans are overly dependent on technology, by the way they are overweight and in floating transportation chairs. At the end of the movie, all citizens over come the technology running their lives after seeing the main character so desperate to save the only evidence that planet Earth is able to sustain life again- happening to be a little green plant. In the final scene, the spaceship returns to Earth and it shows mankind starting to rebuild what they once had.
The idea of a Science Fiction story comes from breakthroughs. It is made interesting by the screen write and storyline. However, the part that makes anyone’s eyes glue to the story is the connections it makes with them. In this way the story is relatable and the audience fells similarly to the actors’ emotions. The Matrix (1999, Director: Andy Wachowski) has many scenes that make the audience relate to the feelings of the characters. One example is when Neo is ‘awaken’ in the real world, in the human pod. As he breaks through the thick goop and the machine unplugs him, it is very common to cringe with disgust because it is not normal to see a human hooked up in that way, with plugs directly in the body. Another example is when the character Cypher turns to a traitor against Morpheus’ crew. Audiences may feel the slight sadness of loss when Cypher pulls the plug from Apoc and Switch while their minds are still in the Matrix world, instantly killing them.
Technology is evolving everywhere we turn. It is hard to imagine all the changes, good or bad, that will result from technological advances. Many wonder if relying on more machines will most likely benefit or be the downfall to civilization. This is why Sci-Fi can be so powerful. It gives viewers imagined insights to any “what if” scenarios, while being an engaging variation of entertainment.
HEY KLUM!!! ^^
ReplyDeleteWell written essay. Ok, so here I go with the critiquing.
Introduction Paragraph:
I liked the fact that you showed the advancement of technology. This helps build the point that you are getting to. Catchy!!
Simple intro that goes straight to the point. :D
Body:
The first two sentences definitely grasped my attention.
Nice job with your example. I still can't believe you are able to memorize names and dates. That's pretty good because it's specific. The last sentence pretty much wrapped the entire paragraph together.
You were able to present the influence that sci fi has on its viewers.
Oh, I believe you are missing a comma in your first sentence.
Oh, nice job, looks like you didn't forget to add credits.
Hey, you used the same example as me: floating chairs. ^^
I liked how you included a cause and effect sort of deal. You demonstrated this in your example of Wall E. This helps to develop the consequences portion and the reason why sci fi movies are made, which is to present the possible outcomes that may occur due to the scientific breakthroughs. Good job in your selection of details when using the example of Wall E. You were able to show the consequences as a result of the high and advanced technology. You were also able to include how mankind may possibly overcome their tech needs. This helps in showing what mankind may have to go through due to their technology crave. Well written!!
Be careful with the word "it" and "them." Sometimes it becomes confusing, especially when the reader is unable to identify what "it" represents.
"fells" (sp)
WOW!! I was there watching the Matrix with you and the only name I remember is Neo. -.-
I liked how you were able to demonstrate the connections that the audience can make when watching a sci fi movie. This helps to develop the idea of 'relating.'
You could use a smoother ending to this paragraph. It seems like it just stops abruptly while you are explaining your example. Perhaps you could end it by wrapping up the idea of your paragraph, which is about connections between the audience and actors.
Your conclusion was able to bring a memorable, yet nice closing to your essay. It basically went straight to the point, referred back to your thesis, and summarized what your entire essay is about. ^^
Great job on your essay. You have a few punctuation and spelling errors here and there, but that doesn't beat the overall content of your essay. Keep the good work!! ^^
Hey there!
ReplyDeleteI would've commented on this last night but i was really tired, sorry.
So here goes:
Intro: I like how you started your intro, you talked about the past first and then talked about the changes that happened in the future. You slowly moved into the point of essay. You had really nice sentence flow. I also like how you worded your thesis, it answers the question and it gets to the point of it but at the same time, it allows you to be able to explain more in your body.
Body:
"Without the ‘science’, Science Fiction would simply be a boring form of just ‘fiction", i really like this sentence because it makes sense and it's true. I see nothing wrong with this paragraph but I think you should explain a little more on why seeing those things on the star trek movie was mind blowing. Also emphasize more on how the breakthrough makes a difference in the movie.
I think for your first sentence, you should replace the word 'exciting' because, it's pretty much the same as interesting. I think the word 'captivating' would fit in, up to you. Good example, i think i used the same one for mine ;) (great minds think alike!) haha. But i think you need to explain more on how the storyline of Wall-e is good and how it plays a role in sci-fi. Also explain more on how having a good storyline contributes in sci-fi.
Good sentence flow, where you didnt start off right away on your main point but slowly got up to it to explain that having connections with the sci-fi is important. For the word 'awaken', i think you should use 'awakened' or 'awoke'. Wow you remember their names.. I didnt :( all i remembered was morpheus and neo. This is a good paragraph, i dont think it needs much changes other than changing the way you end it, it seems to end suddenly.
Good job on your conclusion, it ends your essay nicely. It doesn't end the essay too abruptly. It wraps up the whole idea of your essay.
Overall, i think you did a great job on answering the question. A few more changes and i think you're good to go! :D
Just one more thing, I dont know, it might be just me but i still dont get how your thesis explains much of the 3rd and 4th paragraph. So i think to make it better, in those paragraphs, explain how exploring beyond the facts would relate to having a good storyline and having connections to the story.
-Rebekah
HEYY KORIEE!!:]
ReplyDeleteHere we go,
First off I like to say that you have a very good title:] Its creative!!
Introduction: You introduction grasped my attention and I think you did a creative job in introducing the topic to the audience. It made a point and overall I liked it A LOT. Your thesis statement was very well executed of course ;D LOL, Miss. Perfect over here:] But overall, it worked well in your essay
Body:
You have three good reasons that supports your topic. In the first paragraph, you used an example that made your first reason stronger. When you talked about the (1966 to 1969 series of Star Trek), (Wall-e 2008) and (1999 Matrix) I was amazed that you remembered the dates but it was good! Your examples were good overall, especially how you explained why it related to your reasons. But in the second paragraph, I think you could do a better job in concluding your second and third paragraph because it kind of ended abruptly. I think you can do better in satisfying your audience with a final statement that can either transition to the next paragraph or at least conclude your reasons. You did well in transitioning your paragraphs so that it has a good flow.
Conclusion:
Good conclusion because it wrapped up your entire essay and I think that it was simple yet straight to the point. I think that you make a good point when you say the technology is evolving everywhere and your thoughts in what makes sci-fi powerful. Exactly what a conclusion should be like. Overall, another good essay korie lum lum!!
Hi Korie,
ReplyDeleteI agree with your teammates that this is an excellent essay. Like them, I thought the intro paragraph was especially effective...a great combination of specific detail and generalization :)
I think Shaneika and Rebekah have found all the grammatical errors.
And I think "beyond the facts" is a great phrase to capture your topic!
mrs s